“In the end, if there is a paradise, we will find each other again, because without you there is no paradise”

 

I will tell you the story of a 17-year-old girl, it was almost three and a half years ago. Sunday morning, as usual, she was going to church, looking in the mirror, she curled her hair, tinted her eyelashes, and lips were the final touch. Realizing that she was a little late, she packed her things in a hurry and went. After finishing the meeting, she was walking around the building and now her eyes stopped on him, this smile - immediately conquered her, at first glance, as if nothing else existed. And it was only necessary to say “hi”, and then dates, shared memories, letters for two years on a mission, experiences, sufferings, tears of bitterness and happiness as well, emotions that can never be replaced by anything - all this time they felt it, this feeling of loyalty to each other, affection, support, and of course patience. Because despite the existence of your soul mate, sometimes distance can be destructive or therapeutic, when you meet him again three years later, look into those eyes again and realize that everything is still possible, despite the fact that there were moments that seemed to be the end of the story…Anything is possible, always…And tears rolled down her cheek at that moment, and he, holding her, felt that connection, the one that remained unchanged throughout time - because real feelings are unchangeable…

Does this count as love? It seems like such a simple and understandable word for all of us. Here you have seen him/her and he is already in your head, that full-fledged image, plans for the future, a painted script, or absolute emptiness, lack of obligations and complete freedom.

If our grandparents put something meaningful into the meaning of the word “date”, now this meaning has faded into the background, dissolved, forgotten. I am sure that each of you remembers how in the stories of our ancestors everything began with a friendly meeting, a trip to the theater, life trials prepared on the way, his marriage proposal and necessarily in the presence of parents. It all seemed like a fairy tale, and in fact it doesn't seem like it is. We stopped really sensibly assessing who the person is for us, who is standing in front of us, whether will we be sincerely happy to say “yes” to him at the altar, whether will we be happy to build a house together with him in which we want to see the Holy Spirit as our constant guest, whether will we be happy to see in our future kids the same brilliance in the eyes and that incredible smile that made us fall in love one day?

“Date” is not just a word, it's a commitment! A commitment to be faithful, honest, open to this person throughout the time that you are going to spend together.

There are three main points that should definitely help you, because feelings are feelings, but relationships and love are first of all is work - work that begins with the first moment spent together, with the first promise, with the first step to building a chain of trust.

• Unity (exchange of experience);

Always pay attention to your past, it exists, it can't be changed, but you can draw conclusions and you can do better, it's never too late! Your backgrounds will help you understand each other much better, help you feel what you had to go through and just find support in each other.

• Conversation (mutual self-disclosure);

Communication has always been the main aspect of conflict resolution and not only. In a word, you can hurt, but you can grow wings! Distance and other circumstances can be deadly and hearing the voice of a loved one, reading letters from him, make your eyes shine, make you find faith, meaning and hope again…

• Time (3 months before the start);

Time is the most precious thing we have and the most important thing we can sacrifice for a loved one. Remember, no matter how much time you have together. No matter how difficult life circumstances are, just call, write, hug, come to another town, state, country - do it if you have the opportunity, you never know how much easier it is for a person to breathe, realizing that he is there, the one who always needs you…

Romance, flowers, gifts, a beautiful date - all this is of course a nice bonus, a pretty picture, but no more than that. Love is work, respect, patience and support at every stage of life, and when you feel good and when you don't.

Remember, there is always a chance to fix everything, to start anew, to meet after a few years, even thinking that everything is lost, there is always a chance to love in this life and in the next.

“In the end, if there is a paradise, we will find each other again, because without you there is no paradise”